If you’re reading this post, you can probably tell that I have come back to the blogging world. I was in the midst of writing a comeback post, with all the blog equivalents of bells and whistles, but I’m afraid the post quickly descended into chaos and incoherence. I’ll let the excerpt below speak for itself:

About one Earth year ago, I took a sabbatical from blogging. I’d like to report that I spent that time living a mendicant lifestyle, wandering from monastery to monastery across the cold steppes and linden forests of Old Europe, while occasionally hiring out my services as a snark hunter. I’d like to, but I can’t. No, my friends. I spent the past year in a location so familiar and mundane, it’s hardly worth mentioning. In fact, I won’t. For the remainder of this post and, Lord willing, all posts from now on, I’ll just refer to this place under the pseudonym of “France’s Biddy.” (It’s well known that France has but one biddy. It’s been that way from time immemorial. No one really knows who made the rule, but everyone follows it to. the. letter. Because they’re French, and as soon as anything is canonized as the Gaulishest of traditions, they will all defend it to the death, which creates a bit of a problem because surrendering is among the Gaulishest of the traditions, putting them in a bit of a catch-22.) So I spent this year with France’s Biddy, who’s a terrible conversationalist, but a pretty good cook. She made three meals a day like clockwork, and I never missed a one, unless I was on a snark hunt.

Not a shred of it was even true! So, needless to say, I scrapped it. But ’twasn’t all for naught. For one, it provided me with the opportunity to use an archaic double contraction. Secondly, it taught me an important lesson: Perhaps simplicity is best.

So here goes: I’m blogging again.

The End